My Grateful posts are going to be irregular and sporadic. Kind of like my sleeping habits at the moment.
This past week I did something which I should have done months ago. I handed over my bookkeeping work-load to an ACTUAL bookkeeper. Someone who can do in 2 hours what takes me 2 weeks.
Since falling pregnant with Isaac it's been a struggle for me to keep on top of our business administration work and last week when our BAS was due things really went belly-up. There were two bank reconciliations to do plus a whole heap of data entry to do, and well, this mamma right here done have a lil' breakdown.
It wasn't pretty.
Picture me on the couch, a torrent of tears and anguished cries "I can't do iiiiiiiitttt!!!"
Well, um, no. Crazy lady, you can't. You have FIVE kids. There's a chance that you may already have plenty to do?
Not quite sure why it took me so long to let go of this work and allow myself the freedom to not be involved in our business. It may be because I actually do enjoy doing the bookkeeping and office stuff - it was my paid job for many years, and it's nice to use that part of my brain for a change. But it also may be because I want to do it all. Yep, you know the old 'superwoman syndrome' has snuck in.
I think I want to be able to do it all. It's not that I feel like I should, or that anybody is expecting me to, but I really genuinely wanted to and this makes it harder to let go.
So after my meltdown my darling husband called the bookkeeper and arranged her to take over my workload. Knowing that the end was in sight was the best.feeling.ever. When she arrived to start work I had filed everything into neat folders outlining what needed to be completed so all I had to do was hand them over.
So I did. And then I went and did something good for myself - joined a group of lovelies old and new and learnt how to crochet. Something that I've always wanted to learn. It was totally liberating, letting go of something that has been causing me so much stress and anguish. And embracing something new that will bring many hours of happiness, peace and warm rugs, booties, and beanies (oh the beanies! Can't wait to make one for Isaac!).
So I am grateful for letting go. For taking that first brave step. For realising that somethings are good, but are not good right now, and that that's okay.
What are you grateful for this week?
Joining in with Bron over at Kidspot
for the 52 Weeks of Grateful project