It's funny when history repeats itself.
Here is Rachael, sitting in a dentist chair today, being extra brave and listening well and giggling about the 'funny sunnies' she has to wear.
(I love how she delights in the unusual.)
She needed a filling and was so patient and forgiving when that dentist drilled away inside her little mouth. Is there any other sound quiet as nerve-racking? I don't think there is.
What makes this trip to the dentist a strange mix of nostalgia and serendipity is that today is Rachael's birthday. And today she got her first filling.
Around 26 years ago, on my birthday, I got my first filling.
I can remember clearly walking up those rickety fold-out steps of the school dental van, the smell of the toothpaste and linoleum and air-conditioned air. The dental nurse smiled at me and wished me a happy birthday, and how about having to visit the dentist on your birthday?
Yes, today has been a strange mix of memories and last-times and first-times and of holding and squeezing little hands, watching little brown eyes look at me through the funny sunnies, needing to know if everything is okay. And tasting the fear again, offering soothing words and promises of fruit smoothies and ice-creams.
It was sweet and strange and wonderful to be sharing those moments with my daughter, knowing that the exact same thing happened to me all those years ago. I see so much of myself in Rachael, and even more so today because she was where I've been and I knew how she felt. Serendipity.
And now she's all better. Her cheek woke up after a while (the needle put it to sleep, you see) and is full of stories and pictures to share at school tomorrow.
And I am relieved that the cavity is filled.
And thankful for this chance to remember a day from my childhood, and to offer my girl comfort and grace.
(But no more lollies for you Miss Rachael Bear!)
Amanda xxoo
